Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!
Two adults and two children wade on a rocky beach at sunset, holding hands.
Conversations about sex with your children can be awkward, but avoiding them doesn’t make the questions go away - it just pushes your kid to look for answers elsewhere. Adolescence is a stage of so much change, and kids are often left wondering what’s happening to their bodies and feelings. As one researcher put it:
“Adolescence and young adulthood are times of significant physical, emotional, and sexual developmental changes that often leave individuals questioning why those changes are occurring. During this time, many adolescents and young adults turn to the internet and social media to get health information” (Sunkara, 2021).
But it’s not just teens that need this information: it is important for parents to start these conversations early on. Children are already curious, and they are living in a world where it is very easy to find inaccurate information about sex. When parents provide a safe space to talk, they not only answer questions but also help their kids grow up with confidence and the ability to make informed choices.
Children are developing sexual beings
Kids start learning about their bodies long before they reach puberty - whether that’s noticing differences between themselves and others, picking up how adults talk about bodies, or absorbing messages they see in TV shows, movies or social media. Curiosity about how our bodies work is a normal part of growing up. If kids don’t have that safe space to ask questions or talk openly with a trusted adult, that curiosity may get internalized into negative feelings they can take with them into adulthood. Without intentional guidance, children can develop misconceptions or feel shame about normal experiences - like noticing that touching their genitals feels good, or feeling confused about their curiosity or crushes. When parents respond with age-appropriate explanations it helps children understand those feelings without shame. This will help them develop healthy relationships with their own bodies and with others.
When parents provide a safe space to talk, they not only answer questions but also help their kids grow up with confidence and the ability to make informed choices.
Sexual development is inevitable - every child experiences it. Yet in many families, talking about sex is still treated like taboo. When parents avoid discussing sexual health, kids often assume it’s not something they can ask about. This approach can leave kids feeling ashamed or confused, and more likely to seek answers from less reliable sources. Open communication about sexual health can make a real difference. Research shows that when parents talk openly with their kids it reduces risky behaviours (Grossman and Richer 2023). By providing accurate information and creating a space where questions are welcomed, parents have a chance to share their values with their children, help their children make informed decisions, and develop positive attitudes about relationships and sexuality for the future.
Children have access to have access to an online world many parents aren’t aware of
Two young children sit in front of a lap top, pointing at photos on the screen.
Today, kids are growing up in a world where the internet is right at their fingertips. Social media, video games, or reddit forums expose children to all types of sexual content long before they’re fully ready to understand it. Many parents are oblivious to how easy it is for minors to encounter peer pressure, and explicit material which often leads to distorted ideas about sexuality online. Many parents don’t realize how easily kids can run into sexual content on platforms like Roblox. What starts as an innocent role-playing game can quickly turn into pressure from peers to talk about sex or exposure to explicit jokes and images. A recent report even showed that a 10-year-old’s account could enter “highly suggestive environments,” including a hotel room where avatars engaged in sexual poses and a public bathroom with fetish accessories (Brooks & Otte, 2025).
Many parents hesitate to bring up sex because it feels uncomfortable - and let’s be honest, it can be. There is research that shows that parents often feel uncomfortable and their kids will sometimes respond with eye rolls and resistance (Grossman and Richer, 2023). But the authors also found that once parents start having these conversations, they tend to get easier over time. The talk shifts from being broad and uncomfortable in the early years to being more real and practical as kids grow up. Pushing through that initial discomfort is worth it - kids whose parents are willing to talk openly are more likely to keep coming back with questions. Trust develops within this topic and that will help lead to healthier choices as they navigate their own sexual development.
Research shows that when parents talk openly with their kids it reduces risky behaviours (Grossman & Richer 2023).
Discussing sex can help with misinformation
An adult and child walk along a wide sandy beach at low tide under a blue sky.
For many teens and young adults, asking questions about sex feels embarrassing. If they grew up in a home where the topic was avoided or stigmatized it can be even harder to bring up those questions to parents, healthcare providers, or even friends (Sunkara, 2021). A benefit of the internet and social media is that it offers a sense of anonymity and protection from embarrassment of asking these questions.; the problem is that although there is good-quality, reliable information, it’s buried in a whole lot of other content that is not so great. Social media and online forums are full of mixed messages, personal opinions, depictions of violence and sometimes outright myths. Online platforms often highlight very dramatic or negative outcomes, which can distort young people’s views on sexual health and relationships.
This is why talking openly with kids and young people matters so much.
Honest, age-appropriate conversations allow accurate information. Building that relationship with your child gives them a trusted source they can turn to instead of scrolling on TikTok. These conversations won’t be perfect, and they might come with a bit of awkwardness. But silence leaves children to piece things together on their own - from peers, the internet, or whatever information comes their way.
By opening the door early and keeping the conversation going, parents can give their children a solid foundation and trustworthy guidance in comparison to what the online world offers.
Resources
Here are some great websites for you and your family to use: you can have a look first, but they’re safe places to let your kids explore on their own when you feel they’re ready.
Amaze.org: short, child-friendly videos about bodies, boundaries, safety, and growing up
Every Body Curious: “Every Body Curious is an entertaining and educational YouTube series about sexuality and healthy relationships for youth, ages 9-12.”
Teen Health Source: Sexual health information by teens, for teens
Other websites for parents and families:Sex Positive Families: Offers inclusive, shame-free resources for families to talk openly about bodies, consent, and sexuality.
Talk More: “tools for families to have conversations about sexuality with kids early, often, and in shame-free ways.”
References
Brooks, L., & Otte, J. (2025, April 14). Risks to children playing Roblox ‘deeply disturbing’, say researchers. The Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2025/apr/14/risks-children-roblox-deeply-disturbing-researchers
Grossman, J. M., & Richer, A. M. (2023). Parents’ perspectives on talk with their adolescent and emerging adult children about sex: A longitudinal analysis. Sexuality Research & Social Policy : Journal of NSRC : SR & SP, 20(1), 216–229. https://doi.org/10.1007/s13178-021-00656-w
Sunkara, J. (2021). Sexual Health Misinformation and Potential Interventions Among Youth on Social Media. The Cardinal Edge, 1(1). https://doi.org/10.18297/tce/vol1/iss1/16 Brooks, L., & Otte, J. (2025, April 14). Risks to children playing Roblox ‘deeply disturbing’, say researchers. The Guardian. https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2025/apr/14/risks-children-roblox-deeply-disturbing-researchers
Waterman, E. A., Wesche, R., Morris, G., Edwards, K. M., & Banyard, V. L. (2022). Prospective Associations Between Pornography Viewing and Sexual Aggression Among Adolescents. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 32(4), 1612–1625. https://doi.org/10.1111/jora.12745
